How do I know?
Because I randomly decided I wanted to watch Twilight. Yes, that's right. I WANTED to watch Twilight. Not just the first one, but all of them. Because yes, I do own all five of them. (I got the first two forever ago and the others were on sale for like $4 on Black Friday so I figured I might as well... STOP JUDGING ME WITH YOUR JUDGING EYES I CAN SEE YOU!)
I have a weird relationship with Twilight. I'll admit- I enjoyed the books and the movies have their (rare) moments. However, I also realize they aren't good literature. A friend of mine once compared it to drugs. You know it's bad, but once you start you just can't stop. Twilight is a drug. I avoid it as much as I possibly can, but once I start... it's all downhill from there.
I know, I've probably just lost several
As I finished watching the first movie, I think decided to live tweet as I watched New Moon. While some people found it fun and amusing (I'm glad some of you did!), others... well... they were concerned.
One of my friends asked if everything was okay and if I was being tortured or something.
I reassured her I was fine and kept on tweeting everything that is the Bella/Edward/Jacob drama.
Then another friend begged me to stop.
It was then that I realized, I was in denial. No, everything was definitely NOT okay. I love how my friends on Twitter know me better than I know myself.
Because everything is not okay. I try to be positive and keep going and encouraging, but my life isn't okay. It's not awful and I'm not horribly depressed or anything, but I'm not 100% okay either.
I'm frustrated and tired and I feel like nothing is happening. I realize this is all just part of change and the montage section of my life movie. I get that. However, it still isn't fun. But part of it is my own fault. When I look at what I do everyday, I see that some of this is my own doing.
I haven't been working on my novel.
Before yesterday, I was weeks behind on Cake for Breakfast.
I even joined this 30 Days of Hustle thing, but hadn't done a thing about it.
I've been lazy and then getting sad about nothing happening in my life. My motivation for anything has gone out the window.
So... my Twitter friends calling me out about watching Twilight in a way was my wake-up call. I need to get up. I need to do something. And I need to just keep going.
I need motivation.
What do you all do when you need a good kick of motivation in the butt? How do you get going when you're in a funk? Because I need help!
(And admitting you have a problem is the first step, right? Right.)
(Also, since I did have several people say they were really enjoying my snarky tweets about the Twilight movies... I probably will do the rest at some point. However, I'll forewarn people about it so if they want to block my Twitter for those few hours they can. )